Rum Balls

I am such a liar.

There is no rum in these, nor will there ever be. Well, if I make them there won't be.

I can't say I enjoy liqueur or alcohol in anything sweet. I still remember my excitement one afternoon at the school gate, when someone's mama brought rum balls to give out to the kids. Rum balls are seriously one of the only sweet things I not only eat but truly enjoy. I bit into that glorious little bundle of condensed milk, chocolate and coconut with gay abandon, and immediately wondered what the hell was wrong with it! This wasn't the rum balls of my dreams - this one tasted weird and icky and had some kind of foul tinge to it. I was assured it was only rum essence, given I was about nine years under age, but I was bitterly disappointed. Now looking back on it, all I can think about is Garth in Wayne's World 2 when Honey Horneye gives him an adult drink and he spits it out and exclaims "oh, this coke's gone bad!"

Garth, I know exactly what you mean.

While we're on the subject, rum balls or truffles or dream balls or whatever you want to call them, should never include sultanas or be made from Weet Bix. Thank you.

Ingredients:
1 packet Arnott's Marie biscuits, or plain sweet biscuits (250g)
1 400g tin condensed milk
1 cup coconut
2 tablespoons cocoa

Directions:

1. Crush the biscuits either with a potato masher or in a food processor until reasonably small crumbs.

2. Add condensed milk, coconut and cocoa and mix.

3. Roll into balls, roll in coconut and leave in fridge at least an hour to set.


I recommend making two batches, just quietly....